Monday, March 27, 2006
Thursday, March 23, 2006
Oro !!
Do not expect long posts about my life and problems et alii, because I simply am not in the mood to write much...
So Meanwhile, don't fail to check some links at your left, you will find really nice pieces of writing..
And for your own pleasure, and mine especially:
credits to www.impishie.com
So Meanwhile, don't fail to check some links at your left, you will find really nice pieces of writing..
And for your own pleasure, and mine especially:
credits to www.impishie.com
Friday, March 17, 2006
Thursday, March 16, 2006
"My Honey is stronger than Kenshin" story:
(m ^0^) (nn x) <---(@@ s)
(m OO) (s >.<) (O.o x)
.....................(s #>.<)o KAPOWWWWWWWWWWW !!! (-0- x)
(XX x)
°(m ^*^)° (^^ s)
(m ^)(nn s)
The End
*totally random lols*
(m OO) (s >.<) (O.o x)
.....................(s #>.<)o KAPOWWWWWWWWWWW !!! (-0- x)
(XX x)
°(m ^*^)° (^^ s)
(m ^)(nn s)
The End
*totally random lols*
Wednesday, March 15, 2006
Updates and manga's
So happy Daiforum is back at last, at first I could not believe it..^0^
Still busy as hell, so little time to be on9, even for mere browsing, I do'nt even talk about serious blog entries...
Still, feels good to know a place were the buddies are, be it here, or in 2DL, or in Daiforum....
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Emptying my mind with manga's, finished GTO, now starting Rurouni Kenshin: funny how those echo with my life, or is it me searching for mirrors, I do not know...
Manga's remind me more of the "feuilleton genre" , which was very popular in France with authors like Eugene Sue, or Alexandre Dumas, or Dickens in UK. So far away from the "comic strips" genre as we see it here in Belgium: thin albums in big format, a regular 46 pages in full colours, less coded, and more descriptive (as far as I know). I like how the narration in manga's is faster, and in a way more "violent". Am I feeling more violent myself? Do I feel like strolling around with a sakabatou, or a gun? I think not, since everything happens in my imagination, since the characters' almond shaped eyes and SD gimmicks remind me of their non-real status.
Only the feelings remain, some quotations that linger deep in mind. And always for the best. A Japanese hero is never perfect in the way Western societies envision it: perfection in Asia means Good balanced perfectly by Bad (yes I simplify a bit ^^) : that way Inuyasha is a perfect moron, Eikichi is a pervert, and Kenshin is your regular candid guy. All three have in common to be uncommonly brave strong, and rightgeous, nevertheless...
Or, like in some Seinen manga's like "Monster" or "20th Century's Boys"(if you look for mind blowing plot, go get those!), reality is never as simple as good/bad dichotomy: in the end, you start wondering about values, even if "goodness" and "honesty" still win in the end.
So human, all in all...
Still busy as hell, so little time to be on9, even for mere browsing, I do'nt even talk about serious blog entries...
Still, feels good to know a place were the buddies are, be it here, or in 2DL, or in Daiforum....
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Emptying my mind with manga's, finished GTO, now starting Rurouni Kenshin: funny how those echo with my life, or is it me searching for mirrors, I do not know...
Manga's remind me more of the "feuilleton genre" , which was very popular in France with authors like Eugene Sue, or Alexandre Dumas, or Dickens in UK. So far away from the "comic strips" genre as we see it here in Belgium: thin albums in big format, a regular 46 pages in full colours, less coded, and more descriptive (as far as I know). I like how the narration in manga's is faster, and in a way more "violent". Am I feeling more violent myself? Do I feel like strolling around with a sakabatou, or a gun? I think not, since everything happens in my imagination, since the characters' almond shaped eyes and SD gimmicks remind me of their non-real status.
Only the feelings remain, some quotations that linger deep in mind. And always for the best. A Japanese hero is never perfect in the way Western societies envision it: perfection in Asia means Good balanced perfectly by Bad (yes I simplify a bit ^^) : that way Inuyasha is a perfect moron, Eikichi is a pervert, and Kenshin is your regular candid guy. All three have in common to be uncommonly brave strong, and rightgeous, nevertheless...
Or, like in some Seinen manga's like "Monster" or "20th Century's Boys"(if you look for mind blowing plot, go get those!), reality is never as simple as good/bad dichotomy: in the end, you start wondering about values, even if "goodness" and "honesty" still win in the end.
So human, all in all...
Wednesday, March 08, 2006
*Bear hugs everyone*
I know why I love you all, guys !!
^__________^
More to come when I ahve more than 5 minutes of time on my hands
take care all.
Inuchan~
^__________^
More to come when I ahve more than 5 minutes of time on my hands
take care all.
Inuchan~
Sunday, March 05, 2006
the problem with insomnia is that it makes you envision troubles far more bigger than they actually are...
anyway....i am now seriously thinking about how i gonna continue being a moderator, without firefox at work, and no permanent access to the internet anymore (my job being on hiatus, i really don't know about the future of my cyberlife, to be honest).
i am still around 2 days later forums: the people there are friends, my cyberdaifamily, and i simply cannot let them down.
daiforum was, is and always will be my true home though. should it disappear (virus and hacking troubles still being unresolved), i do not see myself starting anew, getting 14 000+ posts in another place.
more than a post average, it is the vivid testimony of about 2,( years of being active inside a community. with good and bad moments. i won't say it will be my last forum -- i am around others, with the same username -- but it will never be the same again.
i always said that i woudl never leave the forum, unless i am banned. i guess life's irony makes me stay away from it, against my will : with no FF at work, and no net at night, i really don't see how i could be there anymore.
i feel helpless, like i never felt before. because i am a total noob as far as tech aspects are concerned. i claim everywhere that i would die for this place, but the place itself is dying, and without me to hold its hand.
somehow, i knew it has to end one day..i have a family to have, a fiance to be with, a life, well, another side of my life to live. i would never have imagined it wold end that way.
at first, it was a way to talk to people that shared the same passion(s) than me. it soon became more than that. it is the reason, the explanation of the woman i have become now. the person that is talking to you, from behing the nickname, has been partly shaped thanks to this forum. and to the people she could talk to. and sometimes love. and sometimes, fight with. all of them made the little girl grow up, unafraid of her differences. still now, i sometimes have to suffer from loving Asia, its music, its culture, its people. not every person is as open-minded as the persons i could meet in daiforum. some will argue that it is easier to get on well, to accept other's ppl point of view through a computer screens. those who have witness my "fights" with some members knows it is not true. you laugh as well, you hurt as well, in the end, than in "real" life".
i know that i am repeating again, and again, maybe in other words, things i have said already.
i guess that the perspective of losing my job soon makes me realize more acutely about the end of things. it is like i have deliberately ignored from the very beginning that daiforum could ever disappear. it is like realising it now fully, at midnight, tired and nagged by insomnia.
it's been a while i haven't been so opened about myself. it's been a while i haven't hidden the sadness in me behing my almost legendary cheerfullness. somehow, that's what you become, a legend, lol. people hate you or appreciate you, but you do not let anybody indifferent. until people forget about you, and create new legends.
and the most amazing is that some people stay around, always, even though their own busy lives and crap makes them shine far away. you watch them evolve from far apart, and you smile at yourself, witnessing the long road they have walked on.
people like Dai's Apprentice, who is, like everybody knows, my dear fiance, the love of my life. of our story i won't say nothing more, i hope everyone understand i want to keep those things private.. ^^
Stovila , to begin with, his wallpapers and sense of humour, a person without whom i would never have become inuchan
Ken-sama, his neverending cheerfulness, popularity, and loyalty. never have i seen him act against his principle, or denigrate anyone
Rumble Fish and our love/hate posting.....
there is also FOBulous, whose writing amazes me day after day. a friend, a real one. someone that never betrays, and knows how to truely help the ppl in deep troubles. someone that never betrayed me, too.
or Mojo Shivers, who was there to pick me up when i was feeling lost, and had me grow up, even though he doesn't know it. a kind heart hidden by a wonderful writer. a mentor, and my best enemy ever.
Unwanted Fan, who i still wish to meet one day.
My sweet Mima and my dearest Ange Kaorin, Anna too, who i miss dearly, and so many other people...
i don't know exactly why i am writing all this. maybe i just felt like empty my heart, without causing anyone troubles. i chose to tell it all here, half anonymously, in the hope someone will take the time to read, and maybe react. i could have chosen to write it all in the secrecy of my pen and paper diary. but every blogger knows that it is feedback we are looking for.
i do not have the heart to give a title to it all. it is no farewell, no confession, no outcry of sadness...i mean, i am sad, i even brushed a few tears away, but it feel more like a last chapter to a book that will never be finished anyway...
i am genuinely sad, and all the pop/rock of Japan couldn't make me feel better.
anyway....i am now seriously thinking about how i gonna continue being a moderator, without firefox at work, and no permanent access to the internet anymore (my job being on hiatus, i really don't know about the future of my cyberlife, to be honest).
i am still around 2 days later forums: the people there are friends, my cyberdaifamily, and i simply cannot let them down.
daiforum was, is and always will be my true home though. should it disappear (virus and hacking troubles still being unresolved), i do not see myself starting anew, getting 14 000+ posts in another place.
more than a post average, it is the vivid testimony of about 2,( years of being active inside a community. with good and bad moments. i won't say it will be my last forum -- i am around others, with the same username -- but it will never be the same again.
i always said that i woudl never leave the forum, unless i am banned. i guess life's irony makes me stay away from it, against my will : with no FF at work, and no net at night, i really don't see how i could be there anymore.
i feel helpless, like i never felt before. because i am a total noob as far as tech aspects are concerned. i claim everywhere that i would die for this place, but the place itself is dying, and without me to hold its hand.
somehow, i knew it has to end one day..i have a family to have, a fiance to be with, a life, well, another side of my life to live. i would never have imagined it wold end that way.
at first, it was a way to talk to people that shared the same passion(s) than me. it soon became more than that. it is the reason, the explanation of the woman i have become now. the person that is talking to you, from behing the nickname, has been partly shaped thanks to this forum. and to the people she could talk to. and sometimes love. and sometimes, fight with. all of them made the little girl grow up, unafraid of her differences. still now, i sometimes have to suffer from loving Asia, its music, its culture, its people. not every person is as open-minded as the persons i could meet in daiforum. some will argue that it is easier to get on well, to accept other's ppl point of view through a computer screens. those who have witness my "fights" with some members knows it is not true. you laugh as well, you hurt as well, in the end, than in "real" life".
i know that i am repeating again, and again, maybe in other words, things i have said already.
i guess that the perspective of losing my job soon makes me realize more acutely about the end of things. it is like i have deliberately ignored from the very beginning that daiforum could ever disappear. it is like realising it now fully, at midnight, tired and nagged by insomnia.
it's been a while i haven't been so opened about myself. it's been a while i haven't hidden the sadness in me behing my almost legendary cheerfullness. somehow, that's what you become, a legend, lol. people hate you or appreciate you, but you do not let anybody indifferent. until people forget about you, and create new legends.
and the most amazing is that some people stay around, always, even though their own busy lives and crap makes them shine far away. you watch them evolve from far apart, and you smile at yourself, witnessing the long road they have walked on.
people like Dai's Apprentice, who is, like everybody knows, my dear fiance, the love of my life. of our story i won't say nothing more, i hope everyone understand i want to keep those things private.. ^^
Stovila , to begin with, his wallpapers and sense of humour, a person without whom i would never have become inuchan
Ken-sama, his neverending cheerfulness, popularity, and loyalty. never have i seen him act against his principle, or denigrate anyone
Rumble Fish and our love/hate posting.....
there is also FOBulous, whose writing amazes me day after day. a friend, a real one. someone that never betrays, and knows how to truely help the ppl in deep troubles. someone that never betrayed me, too.
or Mojo Shivers, who was there to pick me up when i was feeling lost, and had me grow up, even though he doesn't know it. a kind heart hidden by a wonderful writer. a mentor, and my best enemy ever.
Unwanted Fan, who i still wish to meet one day.
My sweet Mima and my dearest Ange Kaorin, Anna too, who i miss dearly, and so many other people...
i don't know exactly why i am writing all this. maybe i just felt like empty my heart, without causing anyone troubles. i chose to tell it all here, half anonymously, in the hope someone will take the time to read, and maybe react. i could have chosen to write it all in the secrecy of my pen and paper diary. but every blogger knows that it is feedback we are looking for.
i do not have the heart to give a title to it all. it is no farewell, no confession, no outcry of sadness...i mean, i am sad, i even brushed a few tears away, but it feel more like a last chapter to a book that will never be finished anyway...
i am genuinely sad, and all the pop/rock of Japan couldn't make me feel better.
Friday, March 03, 2006
Boobs and complicated thoughts
Instead of buying that dream phone (Samsung E530, in pink, cost: 300 euros)I have been drooling over for months, I think I gonna indulge myself into manga reading instead: GTO is really cracking me up, and all I need now (aside of a good Nookie with my honey ^^), is to laugh out all the crappy situation I put myself in.
Two weeks ago, I got the funny surprise of being scolded at by my GP. She bluntly told me that I was reaaaaaaaaly too complicated, and that some of her patients, that had in average only TWO (she emphazised the "two") neurones, would be able to get on better, and certainly in a less stressful manner that I did. She then handed me a medical certification, putting me at rest for two weeks.
I nearly fell off my chair, but was glad she did.
This, I cannot hide: I AM COMPLICATED A GIRL. Really complicated. Ever met someone afraid to go shopping in her favourite shop, while she manages to win an argument class training, in front of a 100 freshmen? That's me! Afraid of wearing skirts, while she does not hesitate to get into a big word battle with her boss? That's me, baby !! Afraid to drive a car, but flying to Manila the first time she takes a plane? That's me again!!!!
As far as I can go back in time, I see myself as a complicated child, too. Loving books, while her dad and mom do not read anything, but newspapers, playing "imaginary buddies" games instead of loving Barbies, playing a "i will save the whole fantasy world" while her girl friends play mommy with their dolls...
And so on, and so forth.
To tell you the truth, I never felt like I was fitting in the small portion of earth where I was born. When asked at ten, whet I'll do ten years after, I couldn't imagine what I'd be as a grown-up. And the funniest thing for the last: first time I had to wear a bra (I was 11 ) I didn't go "OMG I am a big girl now!!" Nooooooooo Sir !! What I thought was "Gezz, how am I supposed to play Shiryu (from Saint Seya, an anime featuring knights, long story...) if I have to wear a bra???????????
Laugh if you want, but it has been the biggest issue for months: I even started envy my girl friends whose breasts were still a joke, and used to fool around my house wearing no bra. (Until I realised that running bra-less HURTS A LOT, unless you're a guy, or a Acup girl...)
As a result, and at 28 year old and a half, I still look like a shy teenager, who buys manga while her fellow woman rush into the make-up shop next door...
But enough fan service now, back to the complicated topic:
I also met my fiance at the other side of the world: but I ask you seriously...Is it my fault if I never met anyone around my place, that understands me like he does? Or simply fell in love for good? Huh? huh? All the girls watch silly stuff like "Dawson's creek", Dallas, or whatever soap, fell for the incredible situations the heroines put themselves in, but should it happen for R-E-A-L to the girl next door, aka my, then it becomes a "complicated story"?
*no comment*
Had I chosen to marry the guy next door, just for the sake of not being a Virgin anymore, having a big car and a big house, and a lot of bills and debts to pay, would I be considered as "not complex"?
I think that some people finds it easier to call "complex" a situation that is "out of norms". Because of a logic they cannot grab, they like better break the monster's ideas instead of try and understand...It is okay though. I do not pretend having the true meaning of life. I got a lot of friends who are married and with childs, and I respect them as valiant women. And I do not say that my situation is simple: the difference is, I am ready to fight for it.
You see, there is always a solution, and it comes in the most unexpected way....The little girl , ashamed of her (rather big) breast , and her pale skin, has now found someone to match with her own particularities. Instead of calling it a complex situation, I call it "limpid".
;)
Two weeks ago, I got the funny surprise of being scolded at by my GP. She bluntly told me that I was reaaaaaaaaly too complicated, and that some of her patients, that had in average only TWO (she emphazised the "two") neurones, would be able to get on better, and certainly in a less stressful manner that I did. She then handed me a medical certification, putting me at rest for two weeks.
I nearly fell off my chair, but was glad she did.
This, I cannot hide: I AM COMPLICATED A GIRL. Really complicated. Ever met someone afraid to go shopping in her favourite shop, while she manages to win an argument class training, in front of a 100 freshmen? That's me! Afraid of wearing skirts, while she does not hesitate to get into a big word battle with her boss? That's me, baby !! Afraid to drive a car, but flying to Manila the first time she takes a plane? That's me again!!!!
As far as I can go back in time, I see myself as a complicated child, too. Loving books, while her dad and mom do not read anything, but newspapers, playing "imaginary buddies" games instead of loving Barbies, playing a "i will save the whole fantasy world" while her girl friends play mommy with their dolls...
And so on, and so forth.
To tell you the truth, I never felt like I was fitting in the small portion of earth where I was born. When asked at ten, whet I'll do ten years after, I couldn't imagine what I'd be as a grown-up. And the funniest thing for the last: first time I had to wear a bra (I was 11 ) I didn't go "OMG I am a big girl now!!" Nooooooooo Sir !! What I thought was "Gezz, how am I supposed to play Shiryu (from Saint Seya, an anime featuring knights, long story...) if I have to wear a bra???????????
Laugh if you want, but it has been the biggest issue for months: I even started envy my girl friends whose breasts were still a joke, and used to fool around my house wearing no bra. (Until I realised that running bra-less HURTS A LOT, unless you're a guy, or a Acup girl...)
As a result, and at 28 year old and a half, I still look like a shy teenager, who buys manga while her fellow woman rush into the make-up shop next door...
But enough fan service now, back to the complicated topic:
I also met my fiance at the other side of the world: but I ask you seriously...Is it my fault if I never met anyone around my place, that understands me like he does? Or simply fell in love for good? Huh? huh? All the girls watch silly stuff like "Dawson's creek", Dallas, or whatever soap, fell for the incredible situations the heroines put themselves in, but should it happen for R-E-A-L to the girl next door, aka my, then it becomes a "complicated story"?
*no comment*
Had I chosen to marry the guy next door, just for the sake of not being a Virgin anymore, having a big car and a big house, and a lot of bills and debts to pay, would I be considered as "not complex"?
I think that some people finds it easier to call "complex" a situation that is "out of norms". Because of a logic they cannot grab, they like better break the monster's ideas instead of try and understand...It is okay though. I do not pretend having the true meaning of life. I got a lot of friends who are married and with childs, and I respect them as valiant women. And I do not say that my situation is simple: the difference is, I am ready to fight for it.
You see, there is always a solution, and it comes in the most unexpected way....The little girl , ashamed of her (rather big) breast , and her pale skin, has now found someone to match with her own particularities. Instead of calling it a complex situation, I call it "limpid".
;)
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