Long discussion last night with Papa, and all the crap happening at the office. I needed his experience, his wise advice, and most of all, listen to his voice, always shy, when he picks on the phone. His way to say that he cares for me. My nearly to tears, not because I cannot find a solution, but because in this case, there is no other but to shut the fcuk up and wait. Excruciating.
Morning glory and the remains of a dream. I see my loved one, strange places, quiet feelings. I want him I need him, every morning under the sun and rain.
Blog browsing, and the realization that the world is a small small place. She the Girlfriend of Thunder God studies at a few minutes from my job. Hello, Kitty-Kat’ !
Photoshopping along, but I cannot find no inspiration. Filters after filters, the images change, but it is no artwork. It is pre-conceived effects, to give everyone the feeling of being “part of it”. I do not belong to it. I wish I could use real pencils and ink, on real paper, but then again, I am too lazy to learn on that field.
Writing about something but what? Something I know about that’s for certain. Not writing for making money, I do not care of fame [anymore]. Realizing that your link has disappear from someone’s blog. Gives a weird feeling, and tells me I got more self-consciousness than I want to admit. Am I mad or angry? I think not. Will I erase to link to this blog too? I won’t.
Hungry. And at the same time, not in the mood to eat much. I am craving for junk food, but I chose yoghurt instead. My body fights again stress by snacking on junk food, and I command it to leave that bad habit. I miss the taste of chocolate though, and the feeling of completion it gives. Not that I am fat, I never been. But as in my emotions, I like to take control of my self. I need let go on emotions though. Wild animal me, I should have taken a wolf instead of a Koinu.
Taking off my clothes one by one. This is how I feel when I write that way. Maybe that’s what I can do best , all in all. Fiction is not for me, but translating reality with a glint of fiction, I think I can do it.
No comments:
Post a Comment