I remember this guy, last Sunday night...
I was taking the streetcar back home. As usual, when i have a big backpack to carry over, i stand up in the middle section of the carriage, so that i won't hinder anyone's way....
Then the guy came in. His look was tattered, made of old, laid back clothes. Old cap, old mittens, a two day's beard, he carried a guitar with him. Never have you seen such an old instrument, no case, tape here and there....
He started tune his guitar, poorly having the sounds matching. As he pulled the first chord, I turned my gaze away. He start singing in English, his hands pulling basic chords that matched the song not too badly...and his voice was like honey to my ears. And as he was telling us about rivers and deserts, I felt so sad I couldn't even have moved or anything. As he finished his song, he took his old cap off, and ask a little something for the music.
I felt really ashamed, not even having a coin or two in my pockets, and even if i have had some, I would have felt ashame just giving away little money. I would have felt like throw a dog a bone. So I lowered my head even more, pretending he was invisible to me.
I don't know if this guy was a scam or not. For, granted, we meet a lot of them fakers, from poor mother to limping dudes, begging the regular 9 to 5 in the streets.
But, Jesus, you never know, right?
And I remember having seen that guy already, well, having listened to that very song already.... He was there, politely offering a song, maybe this is all what he has after all... Taht night, as I was coming back to my home sweet home, I felt a bit uneasy, seeing my pot of little coins waiting on my desk. Would have I been that broken, had I given him a buck?
Next time I swear, I will give him something. some might say to buy me a paradise. I think that all I 'd want, is to thank him for that weird emotion he gave me... And for changing my point of view about things I took for granted for so long...
5 comments:
<333333
you dun have to be compelled to give something. Take care ne.
Good post. You should have given him something else. If he touched you in some way then you should offer what you can.
i guess the shy dudette in me defeated the moved one.
And i feel like giving him a look would have felt more difficult than giving a coin.
Giving a coin is social-acting. Giving a look is letting all your self-defence fall down...
I sense that encounter had some deep meaning to me..even if i still cannot voice it out in a rational way..
Thank you for your comments, guys !!!! ^^
Giving him something is your choice. But not looking at him is denying his existence. Which when you're poor, that's all you have. I'd say when you see him again, acknowledge him. If you have anything you can share, than give it up. It'll mean more to him than it does to you. Whether he's really poor or not, doesn't matter. It's hard enough going around asking for money.
-FOB
tnx for your comment, Fob.
Still cannot get him out of my mind...
Post a Comment