DAI is splitting...

..or so goes the rumour...

Again, and again, and generally before any "Anniversary Release", the Do As official website swirls under devastated fans comments about some splitting over. It's been two years or so that I am a fan , and it's been two years or so that September proves to be a crisis month in the life of us Do As addicted.

Not to sound offending but... If this is a trick made up by Avex, or by the band marketing guru to have people freaking out and get onto some frenzy buying, good job, guys ! If this is a trick to strenghen the fan base, and get some live performance full of people boosted by the "Last time we gonna see DAI" energy, that's the thing to do ! And please do not forget to charge a maximum in the ticket selling, poor Avex would be so happy.....Your are not better than any marketing team ! Thank you for taking advantage of people, generally young, and have them jeopardize their dreams. Or for some of them, to shatter the only thing they have left.(For, no, the life of a teenager is not always simple. There are serious, unsaid hurtings that you grown-up, (and that I sometimes tend to forget) cannot understand) It is a positive message, a willto face every troubles witha brave smile on. It talks about values, about fun, about sadness in true words. Do As talks the talk that those young poeple maybe haven't found amongst the grown-up people around them.

I want to believe that none of the band member is at the origins of such rumours, I mean, not in a marketing aim.

However... If it is really the will of the members... If Banchan is really gonna begin a solo project, if Ryo-san is really gonna continue his Missile innovation adventure, and if DAI-sama is really gonna stay in the shadows forever...Well so be it.

those persons, and what they brought to me by their music is so huge, so meaningful, so important that I cannot honestly blame it upon them. But sincerely wishing them farewell, and see you soon, maybe, under other projects, under new beginnings.

Face it or not, a bands life in time is always limited.

Does it mean that the dream is over? Certainly not.

Of course I would be sad not getting any more CDs, any more PV's any more infos.. But geez, Do As Infinity, it's more than merchandising stuffs !!! It's about a happy celebration of life! And somehow I'd like better no Do As anymore, than bad Do As, I mean, a band without the sparkle of difference that got me into them, more than to any other bands, any other music.

It is, on a side way, a terrific forum adventure, with people I am glad to have met !! Would the end of a band means the end of the ties? Would the end of the band mean the end of the boards. Sadly enough, I have no power whatsoever to make things going my way. If it was to me to decide, I would let it open. There will still be peopel new to the DAI music, there would be still a place for a Ryo-san section, a Banchan, a Dai-sama one. But it's not my forum, after all. IT's won't be mine to decide.

I am sad because of those rumours, well, mor esad to see how it affected some of the poeple I know. IT is never a good news to see people you appreciate hurting, even if the news doesn't affect you the same. And the worst of that, it's that there are no words, no comfort thing that can be said or done. Just waiting for the rumour to be confirmed or denied. And trying to cheer everyone up, at the best I can do. Only the certitude that music lives forever in our hearts. Might sound cliche, but if one of you got a better way to say it, please do.

It is maybe the biggest crisis of the band existence. It is maybe the biggest scam Avex have ever done. And on that case, don't count on me to support Avex any more (aka buy their stuff).

And it is maybe the first time that no words , no posts, no smileys can get the sadness of some Do As fans away... And on that.. I have no solution...


:::edit:::

on http://www.d-a-i.com/index.html :


1999年9月29日にデビューして6年の時間が経ちました。
沢山のご声援をいただいて順調に音楽活動を続けることが出来ました。
ありがとうございます。本当に感謝の気持ちを言葉にすることは難しいとも思います。
そして今年の9月29日を持ちまして、またDo As Infinityは新たな節目を迎えることとなります。


Do Ａs Infinityはそれぞれの道を歩むこととなりました。


伴都美子はソロアーティスト。
大渡 亮は「ミサイルイノベーション」などのバンド活動。
長尾 大は「Amasia Landscape」などのプロデュース活動、作家活動。


これは3人がアーティスト、音楽家として次のステップを目指した結果の、
ごく自然な流れであると思います。
6年間の充実した日々を通じて得たそれぞれの宝物を
次の音楽活動に生かしていきたいと思っています。


Do Ａs Infinityは解散いたします。


長い間応援しつづけてくださった皆様、本当にありがとうございました。


伴 都美子、大渡 亮、長尾 大の今後の活躍にご期待ください。



Do As Infinity：TOMIKO VAN , RYO OWATARI , DAI NAGAO & ALL SUPPORTERS.




■Do As Infinity ライブ告知
ラストライブ決定！
2005年11月25日（金） 日本武道館

本当に皆様ありがとうございました。
武道館でお待ちしております。ぜひお越し下さい。

※詳細は決定次第、http://www.d-a-i.comにて発表いたします。



メンバー3人からのコメントも後日、発表予定です。


｜ウィンドウを閉じる｜


Translation:

"It debuted on September 29, 1999 and the time of six years passed.
Music was able to keep acting well by getting a lot of rootings.
Thank you. I think making the gratitude really a word to be difficult.
And, it has September 29 this year and Do As Infinity comes to face a new turning point.



Do As Infinity came to walk on each road.


Tomonat Yoshiko is a solo artist.
Large Wataryou is a band activity such as "Missile innovation".
Nagaodai is a produce activity, and a writer activity such as "Amasia
Landscape".


I think that this is a very natural result flow that three people
aimed at the next step as an artist and a musician.
I want to do to the following music activity through enhanced every
day of six years each obtained treasure whether it is a life.


Do As Infinity will dissolve.


Thank you really for everybody who kept assisting for a long time.


Please expect it of the activity in the future as big as Tomonat Yoshiko, large
Wataryou, and Nagao.



Do As Infinity:TOMIKO VAN , RYO OWATARI , DAI NAGAO & ALL SUPPORTERS.




- Do As Infinity live notification
Last live decision.
Friday, November 25, 2005 Nippon Budoukan

Thank you really for everybody.
We will wait in Nippon Budoukan. Please come by all means.

- I will announce details with http://www.d-a-i.com as soon as it decides it.



The comment of three members is announcement schedules later.


|The window is shut. |"

Childhood Toys

Feeling a bit nostalgic those days, I been thinking about the games that accompanied my childhood... In a time when computer games where outta my reach (and where a Packman cartridge practically ruined our TV...)

I was wondering if you, too, had some good memories about games, be it cards, toys, puzzles, dolls.....

Here are a few yours truely was used to play with.... And still posses in her attic ^^

*) The good ole Rubik's cube (at the time, no internet to give you the solution, hehe.......)



*) I also used to *love* all "My Little Poney" toys. Good ole days where poneys resembled poneys, and where material was thick plastic....



*) I never been a fan of dolls (all those baby-like items bored me to no end.....) but on the contrary, I had a pretty good collection of "Matchbox" toy cars



*) aside from a "hoola-hoop" i never managed to spin around my waist , I used to play with that, too ^^ (yuo know, like what Rocky does while exercising XD) "leap rope", or whatever you call that in english ^^



*) cards and family games too.... Trivial Pursuit, Monopoly, or this funny one... "le jeu de l'oie"



*) and more that I forgot.... ^^

Standing aside of them all.

My dad's cousin has come to visit us, along with her wife.

As both him and my dad are talking of the past, war events, sad events, harsh events I only knows about by overhearing some unsaid conversations.... I feel like hiding here in my room, alone, fearing to learn what I shouldn't know....

Past events of people unknown to me always frightens me... I remember one day, my grand'ma told me about her story, about how she survived war... Dark imagines I wish I coud have flied away, expell form my memory... As she was telling me, tears in her eyes, how nasty the Nazis were, I was silently begging her to stop...

I simply cannot stand seeing my beloved ones suffering that much... I am coming from a tiny family, but were links and personalities are so strong that nothing is ever simple... Maybe I am bearing that complexity inside, as if I was the mirror of all those people that made my being on earth possible...

I wish I could know their story, but at the same time I am afraid of what I might discover...

Having a dad who lived in a uber rich house, being driven at school by his own butler, in a big expensive car (back in the 40's) then seeing his dad loosing it all, betrayed by his own kin, then passing away unhelp, alone, in poverty...my dad only remaining close to him...

I couldn't stand seeing my dad suffering again... I simply cannot...

Please forgive me, my dear family.... Please forgive me of not being able to say aloud how I am glad to know that you exist, how I love you without knowing you, and how I regret not being able to voice out all those feelings...

Or simply holding you in my arms...

Because this artist is awesome...

RAISTLIN's FAN ART



credits to Tang Sin Yun !!!


ain't that cool? ^___________________________^


*is fan of Raistlin* ^*^

::::EDIT::::

to add on my book wishlist...

-The Legend of Huma
-Kendermore
-Brothers Majere
-Dark Heart
-Flint, the king
-The soulforge
-Brothers in arms
-Dalamar the dark
-Dragons of a fallen sun
-Dragons of a lost star
-Dragons of a vanished moon
-Tanis, the shadow years

Stop making "what do to" lists, since anyway you never have the time to do all what's on those lists. Maybe limit yourself to some post-its around.

My, My, there is indeed a size limit to the title form....


If any genius of the HTML, XHTML , whatever read this... how to change the code so that the "0 comments/1 comments" line becomes some "ichiban is waitng to be fed/ichiban have eaten x times"

Granted, this is just an example.


Hehe...........

To all the *bad* drivers

WTF is wrong with you?


Does your SUV or big Alfa Romeo allows you not to respect the rules?


For, as a pedestrian, I need to rely only to what is given (I dare say tolerated) to me, this being Pedestrian crossing, and the hope that you drivers will respect MY priority as I respect YOURS.

But when a fcuking b@st!rd, as the ones that I crossed today, who nearly hit me this morning, or nearly got me into some accident this noon, simply laughes it all and disregards my rights (aka being able tu USE the pedestrian crossing, granted that NO STUPID MORON (yeah, that's a pleonasm) parked his car on it), well other than giving him the good ole middle finger, I only have to wish that he and his wonderful car will meet a tree soon.

And preferably a big one.

I am sick of shutting the fcuk up when faced to such sickening people. And since the police (certainly NOT the police) won't do anything to it, what's left to me is risking my life about 14 times (yes 14 times ) a DAY, hoping I won't get in the way of such a egoist of the road as you, *bad* drivers.

I wish that one day you will be in my place, and got nearly hit by one of those big pricey cars you seem to like so much.

I wish taht one day someone less patient and less educated than I will explain to you why you are such a bother.

I wish that one day you will total your oh so precious car, since to you it is even more worthy than a human life.

Photoshop.exe

Easy Ramen ^^

made some "HOME-MADE" RAMEN last night !! (understand, dried noodles pack + what was on the fridge lols)


You need:

- 1 pack of dried noodles "ramen" (there are different flavour, choose one that goes on well with meat)
- 200g Pork meat (thin slices) (you can use beef too : even more tastier ^^ )
- 4 big dried mushrooms
- preserved ginger (the one you use with sushi, dun remember the English name)
- salt, pepper
- a spoon of oil (i had only Sesame oil left)
- a spoon of soja sauce
- a spoon of Mirin
- a few leaves of fresh Coriander


The cooking:

1. Slice the pork in thin slices, about 1 cm . HAve a pan heating with a spoon of oil , and heat it to the max. Then carefully drop the meat, let it grill a bit. Reduce the heat when the meat becomes grilled, then add salt, pepper, soja sauce and mirin. Let it gently cook, until the sauce becomes a bit sticky.

2. Meanwhile let the mushroom dip in hot water. Then, cut them in thin slices, about half a centimeter.

3. Then, cut your ginger in thin slices too, as well as some Coriander leaves. Preserve for later. (but add a few crushed leaves in the pork meat, mix gently, and put out of heat)

4. When all of your ingredients are done, deal with the noodles. Easy, just follow the instruction on the packed XD.(dun put too much water, you'll see why..)

5. When the noodles are cooked, dip in a big bowl. Then gently add the pork slices, mushrooms slices, and finally ginger. (make it so that it doesn't sink in the noodles ---> careful with water !!)spread the remnants of your crushed coriander leaves, and add a few coriander leaves, for decorating it all...

6. Enjoy !!!!


(dunno if this is close to real ramen, but it is yummy hehehe )

Monday, Crappy Monday....

Feels like I am in the middle of a maelstrom, the more I struggle to get out of it, the more i go deeper and deeper... Staying cool no matter what, I'll find a way out anyway...

Woke up in the middle of night, 3h41 am. Turned TV on, crappy programs, is tehre really peopel tuned in at that hour of the night? finally got myself to sleep, helped by the thought of my honey.... strong thought deep thought lots of him, him, him...

Am at chronicles book II. The story is so captivating I can hardly read anything else (I generally read 2 or 3 books at a same time...)... the situations, no matter what the fantasy world, feels real, I mean, the feelings feels real all way through.....

again, tears nearly came true too... ^^



***

To Do:

- learn how Cool Edit Pro works

- make a table of content for my Tagalog textbook

- resize pics, so taht i can make a webpage about it

- learn how to insert thumbnails

- shopping for groceries

The first time in a long time....

Finishing the second volume of Dragonlance -- the Chronicles, I surprised myself by being on the verge of tears. You know, the kind of emotions that suddenly taps on your shoulder from behind, while you are watching a movie , alone in the dark... Well, imagine the very same emotoin, in daylight [well, at dusk], a book almost finished between your hands, in a noisy train, with people sitting around...

For a moment I was there in Krynn, feeling as I was living that painful events too.. [no more will I say, no spoilers here !! :p]



It's amazing, how words alone, can bring you to such a state of emotions. But maybe it is our society, so enclosed in a universe of images, pictures, colours and movements, that we almost forgot the very sensation of words, black on white in paper tears...And it's been a long time since I have found a book able to offer me all this...

Maybe books nowadays lack of this power of depicting things. OF having us actually live the story. Maybe a lot of them deal with faded subjects (books about sucessful people, books about "new writers", provocation, society books, Harry Potter (the 5th volume kinda annoyed me...so loud and so vain...)Maybe people lost the will to read about heroic stories too.... How many of them have seen "The Lord of the Rings"... But how many of them did actually read it, making their way through the story behind the story, the highly spiritual content? People crave for fast seeing, fast consuming, then forgot about everything when it's not "hype" anymore. How many would dare say they think "Aragorn is darn hot" (well, me, I must admit ;) )? Saying that you pre-ordered "HP6" is sooooo much more hype-ish !

On another side, how people would be able to discover those wonderful Dragonlance stories, considering how difficult the books are to find?

My only advice would be.... Unless you got lucky finding a boyfriend (^*^)who can teach you the ancient lore and arcane knowledge of heroic-fantasy litterature, go get yourself the Chronicles of the Dragonlance series. By far, the most well written books in that genre, where Knights in armour seem so alive, where Elven maiden are anything but some silly lighthead brats, where dragons can get a medieval flavour that your KungFu's ones cannot offer you, where fantastic or human characters go through the same pains and sorrows we all know: betrayal, hard choices to make for a life, friendship, love, honour, choices, but also failures, sadness, mistakes or death...

Tolkien can be proud of his paper children....

Raist'

Wrote an entry yes.

But I felt like keeping it private...

^*^


:edit:

let me introduce you to my new collection of gifs ^^



^*^

Happy 29 to us !!!!!

It's our Anniversary !!!!!!!!!


Let's celebrate !!!



o(m ^^)oo(^^ s)o

My, what a week !!

Such a week I haven't been trough since long !!!

Never seen so many slight annoyances, bothering, nagging in such a little period of time.... The telly which goes all funny when I decide to watch it, boss being moody as ever, hiding to us essential information, insomnia, insomnia, insomnia, insomnia...and maybe my getting a cold, and nearly lost my engraved ballpen on top of it all...

Not even talking about that guy who scared the hell out of me this Wednesday.

Hopefully, in the middle of it all, the plane tickets that i gonna buy tomorrow. 66 days left, and all those troubles will be forgotten.

And ranking first on my wishlist, guess who? My special someone...Because, all in all, I could get all the books I want, all the blings, the gadgets, the wealth or the phones I want.... If I have no one to share all that with me.... It would be as useless as a stone in sand desert. I do not want a room full of books, cd's or manga... I would prefer a cosy bed, with one or two books only, a few songs but someone I can cuddle close with, and share my happiness, my fears.... my emotions, in a word...

I learn everyday. I want to learn everday. Especially from the mistakes I do. Be a better person. Be a better friend. Be a better me. Not being afraid to prove wrong, and willing to go further, always. Stand up, again and again, whenever life knocks me down. So that in the end, in front of a God I do believe in, I won't have to be ashamed of my life.


* * * *

[sleep, at last. Inside those arms that, alone, can ease my worries...]

Why Forum matters :

"hmmm on a percentage rating... figure-less... since Do As, besides its music, has been at the origin of the biggest changes in my life...From feeling better in my skin through making friends here, to meeting my Man ...

how bad do i like them? When I think about what my life would be now, not having heard about them ... I would be that everlasting sad girl, shy girl, with no hope of a better future.

There is other musics of course, classical, other J-artits. But none would carry the emotion, the meaning in life the music of DAI has become."


Ichiban, @ DAIforum

Haunting Love

[work notes]

A friend asked me today if I had suggestions about being haunted by a love you are no longer with...

This question made me smile, and for a lot of reasons. Because, yes, I have been haunted by a such kind of love. Even if it was a somewhat adolescent one, the sort of which makes you giggle, when the 30 something years old draw near. But now that I think of it, this kind of love is maybe more haunting than any adult ones. Because to think of love, you think about love with your hopelessly romantic mind, you talk about forever without thinking about marriage, you talk about love without relating it to sex, and if sex comes to the mind, well sometimes you cannot make the difference between the emotions raging on you. This kind of love, dare I say passion, when I comes to an end (and 9 times out of 10, it will), leaves a feeling of destruction deep inside.

Reading a member post in a forum, knowing she is about 17, lost a bf, I could perfectly relate without being able to say anything. Because, you see, some wounds, even if forgotten from long on, can still leave a trace in the soul.

Back to that summer of 95, when I knew I wouldn't see him anymore. The missed rendez-vous, the air of guilt in his face when I caught him back at the train station, told me with more certainty than words that I was never to hear from him ever again. He was my first love, it lasted 3 months in my sweet sixteen HS years, but at 18, I still haven't gotten over him.

Two years of constant presence with him, seeing him with other girls, him being afraid to tell me about them, a constant hide and seek party with my feelings. I used to say to my friends that I lived through him, that I was nothing without him. I had misunderstood love for addiction, for drowning myself into a feeling that was no longer here. I was in love with love instead of being in love with someone.



The feeling of miss was acute though. Like a part of my heart ripped off, living like a robot, eating because mom told me so, studying because hell, that was so part of the game. Going back home with him as an obsession, writing letters (I still have them) unsent, passionate writings I do not even dare re-read now. He was the first guy I told "I love you" to. Puppy love kind. The one that makes you sense the power of feelings your brain cannot comprehend.

[***Never talking about flings I never have the guts to spoke to, here comes my second sweet mistake. The friend/brother I had feelings for, did confess to, but never said I love. There is a flavour of incest about it I have never recover entirely from, so to speak***]

The second time I said I love you was last summer. You could say "coup de foudre", as the French goes. A man, sensible, handsome, and who revealed things in me I never had been aware of. He was giving me confidence, he was giving me friendship, he was giving me more than that. He was giving me so much I could not believe it was true. And as I was keeping the little secret, dreaming, a bit afraid, of what the consequences could be, I said “I love you”, without being aware of what this could trigger. The story ended, two months later. For reasons more complicated than I thought they were. I was ravaged. Something in me had died. Though I had no hard feeling, my reason telling me it was, all in all, the best of ending. I made a brave woman of me. I kept on smiling at days, crying at nights. I kept on talking, staying sensible, until that day of December when I wrote my secret fear. I was game to him, he was the only responsible. He read it. I hurt him. December 1 to December 6 were the worst days of my life. I couldn’t eat, I couldn’t work. I refreshed endlessy my mailbox, waiting for an answer. Asking for forgiveness. I hated myself as I never did. And the good moments were nagging on me like knives. I was no better than others, as jealous as everyone. I couldn’t forgive his moving on, while I was stuck in my sadness.

I found solace and comfort on a friend’s shoulder. A person that fascinated me, a person I was happy to be accepted by. As the situation settled slowly with my summer love, the waters grew darker and darker in my heart. I wrote a letter as a last chance to set things clear. I never said "I love" though. Because I knew deep inside this wasn’t love. I knew this would never be.

I must say that I received the most extraordinary answer. The best rejection letter I could have dreamt of. A letter that somehow put an end to those two stories intertwined, at a many levels. It gave me peace at heart, it made me understand that your actions always reflected upon you the same way you triggered it. It made me understand, maybe, the difference between feelings and actions. It set the counter to nil, leaving my heart all fresh and ready. A heart with scars, but that did healed perfectly. Visible still, but not scary.

Of course, those passed love still are somewhere in me. They made me the person I am now. And the man I am with now can see the mix of it all, the person I am, balanced with her genuine feelings that have never changed (passionate I am, passionate I will be), and balanced with the consequences of the mistakes she made.

* * * * * * * * * * *

[Haunted love]

More than “haunting”, I would say “haunted”.

I made this long intro to kinda clear things of.

I think that being haunted by a former love is the worst imprisonment you could think of. You are caught in between feelings that are real, and a situation that isn’t anymore. Your mind is blocked on a “what if” mode, you keep on thinking about the good moments, and you kinda forget expressly the bad ones. You are not yourself, but the self you were with him/her, and now deprived of that second part of you.

Somehow, you cannot but live through the others. You need social feedback to set your actions in reality. You need acknowledgement or dismissal to set yourself balanced amongst the people you are with. Somehow, you are yourself the best amongst your peers, as odd as it might sound.

Haunted love are like invisible chains you set yourself around your ankle. It it what dictates your behaviour, your feelings (who haven’t felt attracted by someone simply because he/she reminded of a lost love?), your thinking , everything. The more you gonna try to break free, the more that lost love will make feel its toll upon you.

I would say that haunted love is like a wild animal. You have to tame it. A bit like the fox, in the “Little Prince” story. If you stick to it, it will engulf you. If you reject it, it will make you feel guilty. But if you tame it, take it as it is, a story that’s over, but that left marks, then you can start to heal. Hand in hand with your love that is not haunted anymore.

Hiatus

Nothing feels good like a doctor saying you ar healthy... And the support of my loved ones is a reason too...

Nothing feels bad like losing you connexion to the world.

As I wonder if 7.0 is alike 5.0, I take a break from writing.


Scents of Provence in my back, I smell the Lavender from time to time.


[I just want you to be happy....]

Patience

I think I am a patient person.

Well, to be accurate, I have learned to be. I have leaned to tame that quick tempered aspect in me, able to get me burst at the tiniest provocation.

Not that I have learned to swallow. Maybe now I can sense provocations with more humour than before. Putting everything into perspective. Like a mindgame where I try to outsmart my opponent.

I think that I have always been fascinated by patience. It dates back of the time when I was fascinated by those anime characters: always getting themselves in the worst situations...and always take it calmly, being mature, not being defeated by insults or naggings.

Best example? Saint Seya. Where the fights would always begin with a sarcasm. The foe judging his ennemy's strenght... Ten times would you hear the hero groan...His eyes trembling, his body tensed. But he would never let anger blind him.

I lost control many times. For reasons that I believed to be true, and that I consider now with a smile. I remember one day, I was around 19 years old, I tear down a book. My body was emprisoned ina cold fury, and my mind was watching my body frantically reducing the book to smithereen. It was an old book about the USSR, a book given to me by a rich man. "this will be helpful in your studies". I took it as an offence, as a rich man's getiing rid of some old book, to a girm struggling with her classes. And underneath struggling with herself, with a life she felt she hadn't chosen entirely.

That time, I remember, my mother wouldn't approach me. She told me she was sincerely afraid I might hurt her, hit her. The I was seeing her fear, the more I was getting out of control. She called my dad. My dad screamed louder than me. I ended up crying away in my room, exhausted. His power only had been enough. Ackowledging his authority upon mine, without hitting me physically, was enough to turn the anger into shame.



I couldn't apologize. Only enprison myslef into a mute defensive attitude. Then, life would go on, smiles would appear again.

Every now and then, my mother recall that afternoon, when some innocent book had been slaughtered without mercy. And as she lightly talks about it, I smile in a pityful way..knowing that under her smile, she remember the anger, the monster her daughter had become...

It is generally enough to make me think twice before getting angry.

Of course, the old reflexes remains... Sometimes some persons (liek my boss XD) seems to know how to push the buttons, leading to that ancient wrath....But hopefully, and little by little, I strenghten myself against my old demons.

And the soothing presence of the man of y life leads me out of this darkness of anger, day after day.

having a life

- pay phone bill

--pay the rent

-BRINGING A CD-RW TOMORROW SO THAT I CAN GET MY OWN PERSONAL AND FREE HOPEFULLY WORKING PHOTOSHOP 5.0 (hey dun tell anyone !!! ;) at the ofc

-hugs monmon. a lot. and some more. endlessly

-uninstall nikon photolab +but keeping panorama maker+

-install cool edit pro

-install photoshop 5.0 (if i get it, this is ^^ )

-install FTP protocol

-fix that pain in my back

-stop making lists that bore everyone ^*^(no way, Jose..)

-USE the post-its i bought

-ditch that radioblog idea

- making a better use of [ ] [like in]

-[there's a good way ] [using this ]

-[right?]

-know that html is not like xhtml [well, that's the feeling i have]

- stop using words and concepts i do not understand[i call this "permanent learning, eheh ]








-taking pics of my ofc

-stop spamming my own blog

"We are family...."

Family gathering...

Or when the passing away of someone ties up family bonds….

I found myself having a little cousin (elder than I) a really nice person, and funniest of all, we have lots in common… ^*^ A same view on life, a same quick tempered reactions sometimes…along with a same sweetness.

It feels good, when being sis and bro’s –less, you get to learn you are -finally- not alone on this planet.

Underground

Lazy Monday today, so here's the fruit of my haunting the web this weekend..

New York

NYC --Subways and other buildings--

NYC --Chambers street--

London

Paris


Since I cannot remember when I have always been fascinated by abandoned places... As far as I can remember, I always been looking around me, taking a little more time when passing by abandoned places,houses, buildings, and wondering what wooden panels or metal gates could possibly hide...

Above all, I have a particular inclination for subways. I guess you can talk about fascination. It all dates backs circa 1993, when I first used the Underground in London,also called the "Tube". I will never forget the sensation of fear, mixed with excitement. I have to say that I am a bit claustrophobic, and that closed spaces, like elevators or crowded places often gets me nervous.

I will never forget the long descent, endless escalator, or crowded huge elevators. Then the heat underground, the sounds magnified by the round walls, the passing by of metallic trains in a wooooooooooooosh, the crowd pushing, the colors of the various underground lines, the fever while watching the stations names rolling by, and the anxiety whenever the train stopped in the middle of a tunnel.

Darkness everywhere, impossible to peek further than half a meter, cables, hissing of the trains sliding along the tracks, signs, stairs, again, then , finally, fresh air.

And the sensation to be born again.

Same feeling in Prague, where I took the subway once. endless escalator plunging down in the heart of the earth, stainless steel-looking walls and trains, heat, and ablurry memory of it.

Brussels, then, and its ugliness. Huge rectangular spaces, endless ceilings, painted faded yellows or dusty oranges. And my nose stuck to the windows, watching the cables, paintings, devices, and tracks. What I like most is the coming out of a tunnel, when you see a cirle of light, ready to save you from darkness.

Paris, at last, my all-time favourite. Old "art-deco" entrances, white and blue pavement, rounded halls and tunnels, but not as stiffling as in London, stairways, halls, stairways and halls again, like a giant labyrinth. I am a lost Ariane in search for the Minotaure...

* * *

I guess abandoned stations have a particular flavour. There is something melancolic when seeing those places, times ago crowded, now reduced to dim-lit empty halls. Covered with dust, filth, and tags. Silent, eerie and rather ominous. I wouldn't dare aventure myself along those forlorn places. So I dive into the images, wondering about the places outside the picture frames, waiting for a phantom train to pick me up.